When I first held your hand tight
It felt like I was in the lime light.
I could feel your warmth and the love
I was not anymore like the birds above.
I quickly fell down
on my knees
like gentlemen in the past have done
infront of the ladies.
When I held your hand and took a walk
I did not worry too much about the time on the clock,
and life looked more like a cake walk.
Few words were spoken
Yet it felt like there was not any burden.
My heart was so light.
From then on,
Things look bright and breezy
When you come and pick me.
Everytime you whisper in my ears
I feel my life changes gears.
Every inch of my body
from the tip of my toes
to the tip of my nose
moves towards you.
Everything I dreamt has become a reality
You are a reality today
I dont want you to become a dream.
I feel so light and my mind is clear
when you are near.
*************here.
Did you hear?
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Sunday, December 02, 2007
From somewhere....
deep inside.....
Sometimes the physical absense of an entity is so hard to ingest into your system...isnt it ?
You can see that things are not gonna change from what they are, yet you cant bring yourself upto gulping it down.
Its at these moments you feel like you have used all your energy.....
Missing, craving, waiting, crying, wanting, needing...and still it never seems to cease embarking its existence on the lonesome grave.
The lament is too high, the pain is too deep.
And then the pinnacle of uncertainty glides into your heart, creating humungous tidals waves of doubts and questions.
Is tomorrow, just a figment of imagination rooted deep into the crust of infinity ?
Is tomorrow, just the concept of a loner's pain of eluding the sting of nullness ?
A million questions run across your mind in a million milliseconds, yet no answer shows up.
You keep drawing circles, knowing you're gonna keep doing that for a long long time. Coz the vantage point you're looking for, is somewhere hidden in between the lines of the unseen tomorrow.
Aah.........the tomorrow !!!
Whose sole mission is catapulting the innumerable neutrons of maelstroms onto the translucent
membrane of emotions called 'LOVE' that wraps this lonely heart....
Making this lonely heart, ever more fragile....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-W6p-N86Bw
Sometimes the physical absense of an entity is so hard to ingest into your system...isnt it ?
You can see that things are not gonna change from what they are, yet you cant bring yourself upto gulping it down.
Its at these moments you feel like you have used all your energy.....
Missing, craving, waiting, crying, wanting, needing...and still it never seems to cease embarking its existence on the lonesome grave.
The lament is too high, the pain is too deep.
And then the pinnacle of uncertainty glides into your heart, creating humungous tidals waves of doubts and questions.
Is tomorrow, just a figment of imagination rooted deep into the crust of infinity ?
Is tomorrow, just the concept of a loner's pain of eluding the sting of nullness ?
A million questions run across your mind in a million milliseconds, yet no answer shows up.
You keep drawing circles, knowing you're gonna keep doing that for a long long time. Coz the vantage point you're looking for, is somewhere hidden in between the lines of the unseen tomorrow.
Aah.........the tomorrow !!!
Whose sole mission is catapulting the innumerable neutrons of maelstroms onto the translucent
membrane of emotions called 'LOVE' that wraps this lonely heart....
Making this lonely heart, ever more fragile....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-W6p-N86Bw
Saturday, October 20, 2007
Impulsive
arbitrary, capricious, changeable, cheat, cheat-on, coquettish, double-crossing, faithless, fitful, flighty, frivolous, inconstant, irresolute, lubricious, mercurial, mutable, quicksilver, sneaking, temperamental, ticklish, two-timer, unfaithful, unpredictable, unstable, unsteady, untrue, variable, volatile, whimsical, yo-yo*
Go get some life!!
Go get some life!!
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
When you are around!
On that cold winter night
in a restaurant with dim light
we met, we shared and we left.
There was no spark
and there was no lightning
Yet there was a flash
but just a photo flash.
Everything looked normal
I thought I would never gamble
but I was wrong.
From then,
I had slowly transpired
and got used to being with you.
I had slowly acquired
the habit of looking forward to you.
Small talks and bed time stories
all were done with lots of ease.
You came, you saw and you conquered.
I am yet to recover.
You bought me a ticket for a game
but before I could claim
you threw the ticket on to the flame.
I am not sure what was your aim
But I am no more the same
Here I'm still thinking about the game.
Now, this is my
---- To Be disContinued -----
in a restaurant with dim light
we met, we shared and we left.
There was no spark
and there was no lightning
Yet there was a flash
but just a photo flash.
Everything looked normal
I thought I would never gamble
but I was wrong.
From then,
I had slowly transpired
and got used to being with you.
I had slowly acquired
the habit of looking forward to you.
Small talks and bed time stories
all were done with lots of ease.
You came, you saw and you conquered.
I am yet to recover.
You bought me a ticket for a game
but before I could claim
you threw the ticket on to the flame.
I am not sure what was your aim
But I am no more the same
Here I'm still thinking about the game.
Now, this is my
---- To Be disContinued -----
Saturday, August 18, 2007
Click! Frame!
He parks his vehicle outside and slowly opens the gate.The gate squeaks and the dog lying there opens his eye lids and lifts his ears.Several years ago it was the same dreadful creature that had played a spoil sport and destroyed the seat cover. He is even more careful this time not to let this dog come his way.Luckily he is fastened with a leash.
With a big sigh of relief, as he enters the house, she stands there smiling and shy near the kitchen curtain.She looks bright and happy like those blue flowers dispersed here and there on her white chudi top.The blue bottom of her chudi looks like a baggy on the top slowly tappers down to the ankle.
He looks into her kajal lined eyes and slowly lifts his hand up.He then pulls off the kitchen curtain to have a better look at her dress.He had always wanted to buy her a chudi like that after he had seen one of her pictures where she had a similar dress.
Who is going to break the ice? Everyone else had gone out to do some shopping for her niece's Bday.The gentle breeze seeps into the house and bangs the door near the couch.They come to their senses and he takes the seat in the dinning table. It was the same place where he had dinner before leaving the country several years ago.As he sits there, she comes closer and feeling more comfortable takes the seat to his right.
They had been waiting for this day, for this moment.Last time when they were having their dinner they did not know they would come such a long way in their relationship.
Like every other day, they start talking sweet and slowly drift towards pranks and nagging and teasing each other.She tries to tease him all the way saying how she missed her guy friends.She knows that he would feel jealous whenever he hears this from her.
But this time he was right there in person when she tries the age old trick.He picks up her left hand and holds her wrist, palm facing up.She had mentioned sometime in the past, that everything was in his hands. Now he knew his whole world was in his hands. Holding her hands, he knew the whole world was in his hand.
He forgets the teasing she had put him through.He forgets how jealous and upset he was. He feels her finger tips with his right hand.His fingers run through every "regai" as though he wanted to re-write her future and add his name wherever he could.
He picks up the remote and switches off the TV that was playing "Dil deewana" in ZeeThe gentle breeze outside rattles the dry leaves outside the door.He looks into her eyes and asks her "Will you marry me?"He continues, "Honey, I love you so much, you are my world and you make so much difference in my life."
He said, "I have been waiting for you, be with me and we shall redefine our world"He explains his dream again, "I want to hold your hand like this and walk the parks in Paris, the beaches in Goa, the malls in Bangalore" "Jassie has been dreaming of a trip to Europe with me and my wife, I want to take you with me to Europe"
Just then, he gets a call from her sister and she says they are on their way back home.He pats her on her back and says "honey, it is in your hands now, relax and stay cool as you always be"
He switches on the TV and surfs to Zee Music and starts listening to one of her favourite songs "Dil deewana..."Her mom, sister, jiju, nephew and her brother all come in, they all have dinner together and as he is about to leave, she comes to drop him off the gate, she slowly steps a little closer and says "I will"
He looks up to see the moon, the stars. They are no more exciting. There is a whole new world in front of him.He has been lucky he got all he wanted.
He gets back to the house and her mom asks "did you forget something?He says, "no" and looks around. Her sister also now comes to the living room and now he says "yes I forgot something"and continues "I forgot to ask you aunty, Will you let me marry your daughter?"
Before she could reply, he quickly calls up his mom and says "mom, we have decided, you can talk to her mom and find if she wants all these to happen"
It all happened so fast. Their moms talk and decide that is the right thing to do.
from left to right on the stage -Bhabhi, Didhi, mom, him, her, jiju, Bhaiya
sitting, left to rightchota bhaiya, npehew, niece.
Snap! click! frame!
The End of restlessnessThe Beginning of a new world....
With a big sigh of relief, as he enters the house, she stands there smiling and shy near the kitchen curtain.She looks bright and happy like those blue flowers dispersed here and there on her white chudi top.The blue bottom of her chudi looks like a baggy on the top slowly tappers down to the ankle.
He looks into her kajal lined eyes and slowly lifts his hand up.He then pulls off the kitchen curtain to have a better look at her dress.He had always wanted to buy her a chudi like that after he had seen one of her pictures where she had a similar dress.
Who is going to break the ice? Everyone else had gone out to do some shopping for her niece's Bday.The gentle breeze seeps into the house and bangs the door near the couch.They come to their senses and he takes the seat in the dinning table. It was the same place where he had dinner before leaving the country several years ago.As he sits there, she comes closer and feeling more comfortable takes the seat to his right.
They had been waiting for this day, for this moment.Last time when they were having their dinner they did not know they would come such a long way in their relationship.
Like every other day, they start talking sweet and slowly drift towards pranks and nagging and teasing each other.She tries to tease him all the way saying how she missed her guy friends.She knows that he would feel jealous whenever he hears this from her.
But this time he was right there in person when she tries the age old trick.He picks up her left hand and holds her wrist, palm facing up.She had mentioned sometime in the past, that everything was in his hands. Now he knew his whole world was in his hands. Holding her hands, he knew the whole world was in his hand.
He forgets the teasing she had put him through.He forgets how jealous and upset he was. He feels her finger tips with his right hand.His fingers run through every "regai" as though he wanted to re-write her future and add his name wherever he could.
He picks up the remote and switches off the TV that was playing "Dil deewana" in ZeeThe gentle breeze outside rattles the dry leaves outside the door.He looks into her eyes and asks her "Will you marry me?"He continues, "Honey, I love you so much, you are my world and you make so much difference in my life."
He said, "I have been waiting for you, be with me and we shall redefine our world"He explains his dream again, "I want to hold your hand like this and walk the parks in Paris, the beaches in Goa, the malls in Bangalore" "Jassie has been dreaming of a trip to Europe with me and my wife, I want to take you with me to Europe"
Just then, he gets a call from her sister and she says they are on their way back home.He pats her on her back and says "honey, it is in your hands now, relax and stay cool as you always be"
He switches on the TV and surfs to Zee Music and starts listening to one of her favourite songs "Dil deewana..."Her mom, sister, jiju, nephew and her brother all come in, they all have dinner together and as he is about to leave, she comes to drop him off the gate, she slowly steps a little closer and says "I will"
He looks up to see the moon, the stars. They are no more exciting. There is a whole new world in front of him.He has been lucky he got all he wanted.
He gets back to the house and her mom asks "did you forget something?He says, "no" and looks around. Her sister also now comes to the living room and now he says "yes I forgot something"and continues "I forgot to ask you aunty, Will you let me marry your daughter?"
Before she could reply, he quickly calls up his mom and says "mom, we have decided, you can talk to her mom and find if she wants all these to happen"
It all happened so fast. Their moms talk and decide that is the right thing to do.
from left to right on the stage -Bhabhi, Didhi, mom, him, her, jiju, Bhaiya
sitting, left to rightchota bhaiya, npehew, niece.
Snap! click! frame!
The End of restlessnessThe Beginning of a new world....
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Blew away!!
all characters are original.
names have been changed to with hold the identity.
So she had just received the doll he had sent from Paris.
Now, he writes to her an e-mail which she would open sitting in the couch, watching SS music at her Chennai home.
--
There is an interesting story behind your doll.
The carnival was almost over and everyone was sweating, tired and heading back to office.
The Karoke stall was just playing music and the crowd in front of the stall had depleted already and the few who were standing there were just moving their legs and arms as though they became heavier by a few pounds.
I checked my watch, this watch had lost its strap now. It is a gold plated watch which not many of you know. 23K gold from my dad.
So I had a meeting at 3 pm and had to get into office right then.
It was then that I had spotted this stall where they were giving a teddy if you hit 6 pins with 6 balls.
It was a difficult game people told me. Now I knew what I had to send for my kutty pisasu. She did not walk in front of me like the heroines do in movies.
There was no smoke around too. It was just before that the tarrot reader, an old americam lady said that I was hit by a love bug and I am going to be lucky.
Thinking how lucky I am gonna be, as I stepped into this stall I was filled with Preeti in my heart and mind
Instructions were given, hit 6 out of 6, do not cross this line and we will give you any doll you ask us.
I have played cricket long time ago. We used to play in a ground close to my house in Madras. I am an average cricketer who just goes to play because all my "girl" friends would come there as audience. Just to impress them I would run here n there, catch the ball, no no I would snatch the ball from other fielders :-)
It did not impress any one till date, that is a different story.
Azharrudin namaha! Jhonty Rhodes Namaha!
Take the ball, hit the pin! whew!! one out of one!!
claps around! "do it again, come on, do it again" some one shouted into my ears!
Like a bull, getting ready to hit someone, I was focused on my job.
The next 4 pins were all successful. 5 / 5 so far.
Hi-fi's around. Poeple hugged me. The lady who was running the stall said "this gentleman is on a mission, he is driven by something else, you did not have beer, did you?"
The final ball and a a final pin.
Took some breath and threw the ball at hit.
The lady asked me "which doll you want?"
She gave me a yellow Teddy. I got it and when I was about to move, "Preeti likes blue, doesnt she?"
Hey, I need the blue one instead of this.
Bon Jour, Madame!
So I got the blue one and was walking with heads high, springs in my heels.
"Hello Motorola..." my cell phone rings.
"Desingu Rajaaaaa, we are in the meeting room, are you in office?"
I said, "Rob I am searching for the meeting room, I will be there in 5 minutes"
Hey, Desingu Rajaaaaa, can you give me that doll?, Anjali asked me when she spotted me.
I said, no. I need this, pick anything else from my bag.
Finally I send this blue doll to my kutty pisasu.
Instead of playing with it she stacks that amongst other dolls in her cup board.
Blue away!!
Chocolates on their way, honey!!
Au revoir!!
Love you,
Rajaaaaa Desingu
names have been changed to with hold the identity.
So she had just received the doll he had sent from Paris.
Now, he writes to her an e-mail which she would open sitting in the couch, watching SS music at her Chennai home.
--
There is an interesting story behind your doll.
The carnival was almost over and everyone was sweating, tired and heading back to office.
The Karoke stall was just playing music and the crowd in front of the stall had depleted already and the few who were standing there were just moving their legs and arms as though they became heavier by a few pounds.
I checked my watch, this watch had lost its strap now. It is a gold plated watch which not many of you know. 23K gold from my dad.
So I had a meeting at 3 pm and had to get into office right then.
It was then that I had spotted this stall where they were giving a teddy if you hit 6 pins with 6 balls.
It was a difficult game people told me. Now I knew what I had to send for my kutty pisasu. She did not walk in front of me like the heroines do in movies.
There was no smoke around too. It was just before that the tarrot reader, an old americam lady said that I was hit by a love bug and I am going to be lucky.
Thinking how lucky I am gonna be, as I stepped into this stall I was filled with Preeti in my heart and mind
Instructions were given, hit 6 out of 6, do not cross this line and we will give you any doll you ask us.
I have played cricket long time ago. We used to play in a ground close to my house in Madras. I am an average cricketer who just goes to play because all my "girl" friends would come there as audience. Just to impress them I would run here n there, catch the ball, no no I would snatch the ball from other fielders :-)
It did not impress any one till date, that is a different story.
Azharrudin namaha! Jhonty Rhodes Namaha!
Take the ball, hit the pin! whew!! one out of one!!
claps around! "do it again, come on, do it again" some one shouted into my ears!
Like a bull, getting ready to hit someone, I was focused on my job.
The next 4 pins were all successful. 5 / 5 so far.
Hi-fi's around. Poeple hugged me. The lady who was running the stall said "this gentleman is on a mission, he is driven by something else, you did not have beer, did you?"
The final ball and a a final pin.
Took some breath and threw the ball at hit.
The lady asked me "which doll you want?"
She gave me a yellow Teddy. I got it and when I was about to move, "Preeti likes blue, doesnt she?"
Hey, I need the blue one instead of this.
Bon Jour, Madame!
So I got the blue one and was walking with heads high, springs in my heels.
"Hello Motorola..." my cell phone rings.
"Desingu Rajaaaaa, we are in the meeting room, are you in office?"
I said, "Rob I am searching for the meeting room, I will be there in 5 minutes"
Hey, Desingu Rajaaaaa, can you give me that doll?, Anjali asked me when she spotted me.
I said, no. I need this, pick anything else from my bag.
Finally I send this blue doll to my kutty pisasu.
Instead of playing with it she stacks that amongst other dolls in her cup board.
Blue away!!
Chocolates on their way, honey!!
Au revoir!!
Love you,
Rajaaaaa Desingu
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Keep the change?
The whole world looks different
Life is a big load of lie
I feel heavier than my weight
and my teeth are clenched together and grinding.
I go around wearing a mask
sulking all day
trying to find what had befallen me.
Brevity rules now
who else could be a big snob
when anything could incite me easily.
forgetting old things is the chosen option
new things seem to be of interest now
everything around seems to be changing.
But why is it that
I still love you
I still long for you
Why hasnt this changed?
Life is a big load of lie
I feel heavier than my weight
and my teeth are clenched together and grinding.
I go around wearing a mask
sulking all day
trying to find what had befallen me.
Brevity rules now
who else could be a big snob
when anything could incite me easily.
forgetting old things is the chosen option
new things seem to be of interest now
everything around seems to be changing.
But why is it that
I still love you
I still long for you
Why hasnt this changed?
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Time to please ...
I dont remember when we first met
but I remember every day after that.
I dont know why I told you my story
but I know you listened engagedly.
I dont know what you felt after you heard me
but I always feel relaxed after I tell you.
I dont know if people like you are rare
but I know I can come to you to share.
I dont know much about you as well
but I know so much to tell
that you are one of my best friends.
You have been a big surprise
and your picture always in my eyes.
Often times, I might have teased you
now I wish I can please you.
Ask me whatver
u will get all those forever.
but I remember every day after that.
I dont know why I told you my story
but I know you listened engagedly.
I dont know what you felt after you heard me
but I always feel relaxed after I tell you.
I dont know if people like you are rare
but I know I can come to you to share.
I dont know much about you as well
but I know so much to tell
that you are one of my best friends.
You have been a big surprise
and your picture always in my eyes.
Often times, I might have teased you
now I wish I can please you.
Ask me whatver
u will get all those forever.
Monday, March 26, 2007
Every morning
I woke up and opened my eyes
thinking I would see you.
Only my disappointment grew.
I looked up to my cell phone
thinking I would have a voice mail
only my hopes were to derail.
I opened up my laptop
thinking I could catch you online
only my expectations were to resign.
It was very difficult to wake up
But Who said, I am gonna give up?
I know soon you are gonna turnup.
Finally I did hear from you
Enough of our hide n seek
It was so sweet to hear you speak.
A few words you spoke
have given me lots of hope.
A few minutes we spent
have made me feel jubilant.
Let things not change.
Anything for your charming smile...
thinking I would see you.
Only my disappointment grew.
I looked up to my cell phone
thinking I would have a voice mail
only my hopes were to derail.
I opened up my laptop
thinking I could catch you online
only my expectations were to resign.
It was very difficult to wake up
But Who said, I am gonna give up?
I know soon you are gonna turnup.
Finally I did hear from you
Enough of our hide n seek
It was so sweet to hear you speak.
A few words you spoke
have given me lots of hope.
A few minutes we spent
have made me feel jubilant.
Let things not change.
Anything for your charming smile...
Thursday, February 15, 2007
You are the answer
Green looks even more greener,
The days look a lot longer,
The smiles become even broader.
I know you are the answer.
My favorite color is now blue.
In everything I like, I see you.
I feel like asking you what to do.
I know you hold the clue.
Up there in the moon lit terrace
as you try every move of your dance,
I want to come up close
and look straight into your face.
But you asked me to go and rest
thinking that you are doing the best.
I bet, your act has impressed
though I am unable to digest.
Eventhough I dont see you tonight
I will be happy and bright.
I will fly high like a kite
you will be the object of my delight.
Because I will be thinking of you throughout
my life.
The days look a lot longer,
The smiles become even broader.
I know you are the answer.
My favorite color is now blue.
In everything I like, I see you.
I feel like asking you what to do.
I know you hold the clue.
Up there in the moon lit terrace
as you try every move of your dance,
I want to come up close
and look straight into your face.
But you asked me to go and rest
thinking that you are doing the best.
I bet, your act has impressed
though I am unable to digest.
Eventhough I dont see you tonight
I will be happy and bright.
I will fly high like a kite
you will be the object of my delight.
Because I will be thinking of you throughout
my life.
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
Thinking of U and just U
This is another inexplicable situation
For folks like me this is not uncommon.
Your "Good Morning" begins my day
and You make me happy straightaway.
On any day I can make a big headway
thinking of you and just you.
Everyday, I wake up from sound sleep
and even before my eyes could peep
my mind and heart does a big leap
thinking of you and just you.
When I dont see you around
I feel like i am getting drowned.
You should know in the back ground, I'm
thinking of you and just you.
It is bad that you did not come
though you know I will feel lonesome.
Anyways I will always write you a poem
thinking of you and just you.
I spent the whole day thinking of you.
Surprised you did not show up for my rescue.
I still dont have any clue
but i will keep thinking of you and just you.
This is another inexplicable situation
For folks like me this is not uncommon.
For folks like me this is not uncommon.
Your "Good Morning" begins my day
and You make me happy straightaway.
On any day I can make a big headway
thinking of you and just you.
Everyday, I wake up from sound sleep
and even before my eyes could peep
my mind and heart does a big leap
thinking of you and just you.
When I dont see you around
I feel like i am getting drowned.
You should know in the back ground, I'm
thinking of you and just you.
It is bad that you did not come
though you know I will feel lonesome.
Anyways I will always write you a poem
thinking of you and just you.
I spent the whole day thinking of you.
Surprised you did not show up for my rescue.
I still dont have any clue
but i will keep thinking of you and just you.
This is another inexplicable situation
For folks like me this is not uncommon.
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
The color is blue
The color is blue everywhere
and many people show u they care.
All the birds out there fly high
and you are the apple of all eyes
Your favorite music in the air
and you are an object for fanfare.
Yet for me this is not a special day
as long as I stay away.
I waited for one long year
to wish you in your ears.
Till yesterday the wait wasn't long
now I know I was wrong.
When the clock stroke eleven forty five
my patience went for a dive
when the clock stroke eleven forty eight
I knew I could not wait.
when it was eleven forty nine
it was still not the right time.
The clock hits twelve
my impatience shelved.
Wishes flying around
people get you crowned
you stay astound
as you hear the clapping sound!
I stay here and shout out "Happy Bday!!"
Will meet you when I'm homebound.
The days good things will continue
All around the color is blue.
and many people show u they care.
All the birds out there fly high
and you are the apple of all eyes
Your favorite music in the air
and you are an object for fanfare.
Yet for me this is not a special day
as long as I stay away.
I waited for one long year
to wish you in your ears.
Till yesterday the wait wasn't long
now I know I was wrong.
When the clock stroke eleven forty five
my patience went for a dive
when the clock stroke eleven forty eight
I knew I could not wait.
when it was eleven forty nine
it was still not the right time.
The clock hits twelve
my impatience shelved.
Wishes flying around
people get you crowned
you stay astound
as you hear the clapping sound!
I stay here and shout out "Happy Bday!!"
Will meet you when I'm homebound.
The days good things will continue
All around the color is blue.
Setting things right!
I know you will be upset.
and I know I did not do the best.
I kow you were left all alone
and you did not expect I will be gone.
I knew you will be angry
and I accept that I am faulty.
I know I have to set this right
to make you happy and look bright.
Our weekly quota for fight is over
and the rest of the week looks greener
So let us spend the rest of the week with no fight.
and I know I did not do the best.
I kow you were left all alone
and you did not expect I will be gone.
I knew you will be angry
and I accept that I am faulty.
I know I have to set this right
to make you happy and look bright.
Our weekly quota for fight is over
and the rest of the week looks greener
So let us spend the rest of the week with no fight.
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